Comments on: What Would You Do? Majority Lessons In Etiquette: Extending Invitations http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/ life with a side of skepticism & 3 girls Sat, 22 Nov 2008 02:22:24 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.2 By: kathleen http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-795 kathleen Wed, 23 Jan 2008 15:16:19 +0000 http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-795 good lord, where did you find these people. good lord, where did you find these people.

]]> By: themommykelly http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-47 themommykelly Tue, 23 Oct 2007 14:00:35 +0000 http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-47 Penny. You are a saint! Patience extraordinaire! God bless you! You did hit the nail on the head, though when you wrote "it is rude to include people who don't live in the same house on the same invitation" and "it's not hard to find people's postal addresses these days". Simply said, sticking to this principle avoids alot of misunderstanding. I also usually send an invitation to the people who I think might not be able to come just the same, as an expression of our love for and desire to include them in our family events. Whether or not a person can or cannot come is a matter of the response, not the invitation, and an invitation is by no means an expectation that people must come, travel, etc... that's what the RSVP is all about. As a rule of thumb, I neither RSVP to or go to events for which I did not receive an invitation at my own email or address. This is probably because Hubby's family has a strange anti-etiquette way of inviting themselves and inviting you to things you were not actually invited to to begin with! I've been put in that situation way too many times! It's very uncomfortable. I've also been on the host's end of the deal and that's quite uncomfortable as well. Penny. You are a saint! Patience extraordinaire! God bless you!

You did hit the nail on the head, though when you wrote “it is rude to include people who don’t live in the same house on the same invitation” and “it’s not hard to find people’s postal addresses these days”. Simply said, sticking to this principle avoids alot of misunderstanding.

I also usually send an invitation to the people who I think might not be able to come just the same, as an expression of our love for and desire to include them in our family events. Whether or not a person can or cannot come is a matter of the response, not the invitation, and an invitation is by no means an expectation that people must come, travel, etc… that’s what the RSVP is all about.

As a rule of thumb, I neither RSVP to or go to events for which I did not receive an invitation at my own email or address. This is probably because Hubby’s family has a strange anti-etiquette way of inviting themselves and inviting you to things you were not actually invited to to begin with! I’ve been put in that situation way too many times! It’s very uncomfortable. I’ve also been on the host’s end of the deal and that’s quite uncomfortable as well.

]]> By: Penny http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-44 Penny Tue, 23 Oct 2007 07:43:28 +0000 http://takenwithagrainofsalt.com/home/2007/10/22/what-would-you-do-majority-lessons-in-etiquette-extending-invitations/#comment-44 man... I dunno if there is a right answer here but #1: Big parties aren't me, so my kid birthday parties are <i>selective</i>. I only invite those who are most likely to want to come, and the relatives who are closest in relation... not the second cousins twice removed ones. I have one out of town friend who I usually call or txt prior to posting the invite to let her know the date, and to offer a bed for the night. She has relatives in town anyway who she normally stays with, but occasionally she stays with me. Those that don't RSVP I'd call... but so far I haven't had it happen. In any case I always over cater so it wouldn't be a big deal. #2: Probably b... though I would send the note myself to say we wouldn't be coming. It is rude to include people who don't live in the same house on the same invitation. It's not that hard to find people's postal addresses these days. #3: Probably a ... life happens and I would probably not get too het up about it. More food for me! :) Actually I'd probably persuade them to come later and start without them. #4: Hmmm... email is a less formal invitation so it would be easy for MIL to forward it along to the kiddos. Though I would reply directly to the person inviting. Of course, if MIL forgot to send on the info I wouldn't be turning up on the off chance. Too bad. man… I dunno if there is a right answer here but
#1: Big parties aren’t me, so my kid birthday parties are selective. I only invite those who are most likely to want to come, and the relatives who are closest in relation… not the second cousins twice removed ones. I have one out of town friend who I usually call or txt prior to posting the invite to let her know the date, and to offer a bed for the night. She has relatives in town anyway who she normally stays with, but occasionally she stays with me. Those that don’t RSVP I’d call… but so far I haven’t had it happen. In any case I always over cater so it wouldn’t be a big deal.

#2: Probably b… though I would send the note myself to say we wouldn’t be coming. It is rude to include people who don’t live in the same house on the same invitation. It’s not that hard to find people’s postal addresses these days.

#3: Probably a … life happens and I would probably not get too het up about it. More food for me! :) Actually I’d probably persuade them to come later and start without them.

#4: Hmmm… email is a less formal invitation so it would be easy for MIL to forward it along to the kiddos. Though I would reply directly to the person inviting. Of course, if MIL forgot to send on the info I wouldn’t be turning up on the off chance. Too bad.

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